Thursday, August 13, 2009

Who's There?

So you’re staring at the white screen, your favorite drink next to you, perhaps some good music in the background to set the mood. But you just sit there, watching the little black cursor blink…blink. You want to write something…no, you need to write something. No…you need to want to write something. You’re grade-A frustrated, and nothing coming out of your head, all the ideas, seem worthy enough for what you’re trying to accomplish. The characters you’ve spent weeks creating are taking a nap inside the couch of your mind. You’re screwed…Ah, and this would be a good song to write to…damnit!

Suddenly a goldfinch finds a way to fly into your room and lands on your mouse pad: “I have an offer you can’t refuse.”

“Excuse me?”

“In ten seconds, someone will knock on your door. Obviously you’re frustrated, and I hear you. Us birds, we’re frustrated too…I mean, life kinda sucks. I mean, it’s hot!”


“So basically, when there’s a knock on the door, I can make it whoever you want it to be. Let’s make it a writer. Living or dead…it can be anyone…you’re gonna pour them coffee, and you get to pick their brain for two hours.”

“Any writer?”

“Living…or dead. Think about it.”

And so the goldfinch flies away, leaving you to your blinking thoughts and transcendent music.

If you could spend two hours talking with any writer, living or dead, who would it be?


  1. Roger Zelazny. No contest.

  2. Just one?? Well, Guy Gavriel Kay - Tigana, A Song for Arbonne, The Lions of Al-Rassan, Ysabel, The Fionavar Tapestry, and a few more I can't think of right now. Tigana's the best, btw.

  3. Most definitely Alexandre Dumas. As stuffy as that might sound, I'd love to listen to him talk about his life, how he lived it, and what he did to get his creative juices flowing.

    My idealistic view of him tells me that he never had writer's block. He never sat in front of a sheet of paper and wondered where his characters had run off to. But the realistic human in me knows that he HAS had that moment, where nothing came out of his head when he needed it.

    Comforting, eh?

    Either way, it would be nice to know how he broke himself of that dreaded writer's block. :)

  4. Since I already talk to myself I guess that doesn't count... :-) .... kidding

    This is a tough one. As you all know I'm not much for ultra-literary works, and I don't do fantasy or YA, so the most interesting authors for me are the mystery and thriller writers.

    But if I had to pick just one, it would be Michael Crichton.

  5. Kurt Vonnegut or Hunter S. Thompson.

    *I'm so predictable*

  6. My first thought was Stephen King. Then I thought of Tolkien, and the R.A. Salvatore. Then Sherrilyn Kenyon, and Ann Rice. Michael Crichton and Clive Cussler came up too. Can I just have two hours with each one consecutively?

  7. A couple of years ago I would have said Virginia Woolf. The thing is, though, that she left so much written material behind (diaries, letters) that you almost can talk to her, and for certain periods of her life almost every moment is explorable.
    So maybe someone whose interior life remains a total mystery. I think any literary critic and quite a few readers would trade world peace for the chance to spend 10 minutes with Emily Bronte.

  8. I battled all day with this, but I got to go with Homer...just to ask him about his process, who he was, etc...

    But to just chill with Jon Krakauer for two hours would be pretty sweet as well.

  9. Wilson Rawls. Without question.

  10. Sir Conan Doyle. or Edgar Rice Burroughs. Maybe Margaret Mitchell since one is such a lonely number.


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